Fave. Quote # 30

"In the end we only regret the chances we didn't take" Unknown.

Fave. Quote #29

"Life, is not about having and getting. But being and becoming."- Myrna Loy

Inner Thoughts #4

There are times now and then when two beings fall into a deep. glorious, ecstatic stage of "Love". Normally, the energy is good for the two. And those two live and prosper happily for the rest of their lives. But when two Non Cupidos get together; they don't have to be the same name nor origin. One Light and other Dark; they must be cautious of each other. For the hunger of the dark one may increase and take it to unnecessary drastic measures and loose respect for the Light. The Light unknowingly being slowly consumed by the Dark. And when noticed the Light may defend itself from the Dark. Separating the two from what they can only provide for each other.

Fave. Quote #28

"Do not correct a fool , or he will hate you; correct a wise man, and he will appreciate you." Unknown

Fave. Quote #27

"When looking for a tree of truth in a forest of illusions... The only reliable compass is the soul"- Enza C.

Fave. Quote #26

"Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster"- Nietzsche

Inner Thoughts #3

      What does it mean to have Friends, to have Family ? What do those words even mean ? THe dictionary says that "

friend

  [frend]  Show IPA

noun

1.

a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard.

2.

a person who gives assistance; patron; supporter: friends of the Boston Symphony.

3.

a person who is on good terms with another; a person who is not hostile: Who goes there? Friend orfoe?

4.

a member of the same nation, party, etc.

5.

( initial capital letter ) a member of the Religious Society of Friends; a Quaker." and "

fam·i·ly

  [fam-uh-lee, fam-lee]  Show IPA noun, plural fam·i·lies, adjective

noun

1.

a.

a basic social unit consisting of parents and their children, considered as a group, whetherdwelling together or not: the traditional family.

b.

a social unit consisting of one or more adults together with the children they care for: a single-parent family.

2.

the children of one person or one couple collectively: We want a large family.

3.

the spouse and children of one person: We're taking the family on vacation next week.

4.

any group of persons closely related by blood, as parents, children, uncles, aunts, and cousins: to marry into a socially prominent family.

5.

all those persons considered as descendants of a common progenitor.". But sometimes the people you were taught to call family don't always feel like it. And those who call themselves friends are sheep. Be careful to who or whom you give your heart to. Your heart is very special. People just never seem to understand that. When you express yourself to others you are showing your strengths and slightly showing your weaknesses. Weaknesses that can be used against you. Be careful who you call  friends. Be careful who you call family. I am not saying that you can not trust anyone. And I am not saying that living is easy. Especially in this society.

Fave. Quote #25

"Friends stick together"-Unknown

Fave. Quote # 24

"The past is a ghost, the future a dream, and all we ever have is now."

Fave. Quote #23

It's not about what you wear or how you look that makes a difference it's how your mind is expanded and your heart. Expand your mind and expand your heart and physical strength and beauty will be your reward. The key is love and morality my friends. Kindness and respect loyalty and obedience all of which will lead to your honor. Money, females and cars is only a temporary glory true glory comes from within. It took me a while but now I believe my ignorance has been removed and so has my taint. God is the answer to morality and human decision free will to do good or evil decide my brothers and sisters and understand that the choices you make today will either benefit you or destroy you. be wise open your eyes and expand your let your spirit connect with all that is around you be one with the earth and b one with god love don't hate.
                                                                                                                  -Christian Rodriguez-

Inner Thoughts #3

Today I learned that like many of us have our own monsters, some worst than others; we have our own Hell. And we have our own Heaven. As well as we have our own Home. They're unique to us as we we are unique to the world, the universe, even the mirrors that loves to pull tricks on us. What we don't know is that we create these. We create them. Like our Home, it becomes a part of us and who we are. Life can be Heaven, Life can be Hell. But we have brief, VERY VERY brief moments of each. It's already bad enough that we can't remember how we look without the mirrors. Yet we continue to make a fools of ourselves. Filling these empty hearts with materials. What's worse is that these materials such as; money, jewelry, electronics, nail polish, CHAINS, are often paid with the biggest and necessary sacrifices. Some people kill and shed blood for these. Whilst others pay the little bit of love they have in them instead of placing their love and hearts where it's needed most. Yourselves. Another important I learned throughout this beginning of a lifetime is that "You love others until you learn to LOVE yourself". Loving yourself doesn't mean to put yourself before everyone else. That is something that you must learn on your own. For I yet have found the secrets to life. Why fill our heart with objects that can't even show the same affection you show them ? I understand that sometimes a teddy bear is what we can hold on to when no one can, but some of us don't even appreciate an ignore those who are there for us and who has always been there through our own Heaven and Hell whilst they go through their own... appreciate what you have. And stop looking through your eyes. We don't need them to see the truth. We love making fool of ourselves. We do it to escape reality.

To a friend

A real man goes through hell not for himself but for others. A real man takes and makes necessary risks regardless  the sacrifices. But like any other person time to time, they can and do feel emotions and are not afraid to stand for what they hold dear. They can and or will offer help when sought for. And when offered they need help to except. Especially when it comes to the gun in the mirror. 

I don't know...

I don't know what to do...

...

      In life, there are those who look down on you, who praise you, and those who hate you. In this world everyone suffers. Regardless on how "bad" your life is, just remember that somewhere in the world somebody else is go through worse pain. So enough of the petty cries. The unnecessary cries of course. Time and time again I see two different people cry now and then.


      Why ? Because something tragic happened. Person A is tearing while person B is sobbing. Person A's only family member just died the night before. That family member always stood beside person A ever since they met. Now person B is sobbing because person B didn't get the exact phone company they wanted. As I watch this I wish the best for both and bless person A.

      I wish both the best because person A's new journey just began. And person A is going to have to walk the paths I wish person B the best because if you are going to cry over spilled milk then how are you going to handle real problems in life ? There are more important things in this world than electronics and their brand names.

     

I found this on a scrap paper outside

Great. I guess I’ve got it all together. I’m a disgrace to all the “role models” I based on what I’ve always wanted to be. I’ve failed. I’ve brought dishonor yto those I love. I’ve olied t o everyone including m y se;f. I am a lie. WHo knows this life could be a lie. What do I know. This whole world probably doesn’t evn exist. I could just probably be dreaming... anightmare.  Angry at myself. I have no hope. Such disapointment such disgrace. All I ever wante to be was a sign for those who were lost and hopeless. But now what ? I guess I’ves always been selfish. I just wanted  to take everyones pain away. Yet instead i wished it all away from me. Now I’m left with mocking scars. SCARS THAt WONT LET GO. SCRAS TRHAT WONT FORGIVE> THE PAST. SCARS THAT WONT FORGIVE ME.


This was on the other side;

Break me down

Come tear me open

Dissection is the only way

the only way you can have me

HAve my soul !

But I’ll never let you have it

Never !!!

Look into my eyes

Fall into the abyss

Can you see the light ?

Too bad, ‘cause you’re not coming in

I won’t let you in !

Inner thought #2

Depends if we know what love is. Those who can not love in a society in which love is fed upon can learn the way and sensation, then sometimes envy will lead to the "Non Lovers" to feed upon it and steal love for themselves. Become selfish and corrupted. Other times, the crucial disease loneliness will take effect and send the Non Lover to a hollow sate in which the hole in their chest becomes deeper than the average human. Evolved being, just having one percent of humanity makes you human. There is no way escaping it. There are those who try to love. But can only pretend.

Wish Was Made (part 2)

A wish was made and granted

But never understood

Yet I see now

The ‘truth’

“To un-able to feel love”

Was what I asked...

And still

I wish to ‘protect’

To trust

To risk everything on...

What ?

Yes I know.

“Love is not a feeling at all,

It is but an ability.

An ability that of strong endurance and effect

Contagious like a cold’s sneeze

Warm like a fire

It pains me,

To see....

Inner Thoughts #2

“Love Burns The Brightest, But The Brightest Flames Leaves The Deepest Scars”

In the past I’ve been picked on and so on. Always was the kid that played the punk or “Freak”. And throughout time I’ve been becoming immune  to such illness. In other words, as a human: I don’t give a ‘FU*K” if you “try” to “hurt” me anymore. I  Can take it ! Push my buttons, cross my lines, set me off ! But do so with a loved you, someone I keep dearly close to what I can “call a heart”, and I’ll snap like a rabid dog. There’s no game there. Even if I get my organs beat out of me I am going to take that stand and will not let that being fall. Not when I’m around.

Or at least not when I am given a chance.

Fave. Quote#22

"And a word to the wise when the fire dies you think it's over but it's just begun" -Avenged Sevenfold-

Fave. Quote#21

"His smile and his dagger were very close"-Historian of Philip II's Court

Fave. Quote#20

"The unknown soldier has to feel. If he bleeds he feels. If he feels he cares. He can even be scared" -Elijah X.-

Fave. Quote#19

"To be or not to be..."-(Hamlet) Shakespear

Fave. Quote #18

"Warriors have a knack for liking strange stuff, and the unknown soldier is Unknown until he finds himself.

In other words strange is more of a change that must be taken. " -Elijah Xiques-

Fave. Quote #17

"Absolute power corrupts absolutely" -Lord Actaon (1800s)

Inner Thoughts #1

" Is it not interesting that throughout time and history, human civilizations have crashed, fell to great disasters and yet, yet, t'was rebuilt in an extraordinary effort and time to a somewhat brand society ?  It really defines the terms "The end id where we begin" or in other words; "The end is just the beginning" in a bewildering as well as a blank perspective" -Thy Beloved Anonymous

Fave. Quote #16

"Find what you love and let it kill you" -Bukowski-

Fave. Quote #15

"If you love two people at the same time, choose the second. Because if you really loved the first one, you wouldn't have fallen for the second"-Johnny Depp-

I am Not You

I'm not bad
I'm not good
I am neither dark or light
I would get mad
But not enough to start a fight
I can hate with passion
And so with love
I am neither a crow
Or a dove
I'm not black
Nor am I white
I may listen
Express my opinion
Respond, with my insight
I don't look for war nor trouble
Though it may follow and find me
I am not a fiend
I am not a friend
I am not a hero
Nor I a villan
I can be an animal
Yet still be so human
I can hurt
I can heal
I can even bring myself to give or steal
I can be a virgin
And I could not
I can be a murderer
Or create life
I cold learn from my mistakes
Or remain unworthy of a second chance
I can speak
Or stay silent
I can be a prisoner or a fugitive
But I can also be free

So I've made my decision
And let my grey wings take flight

Fave. Quote #14

"You didn't love her. You just didn't want to be alone. Or maybe, maybe she was good for your ego. Or, or maybe she made you feel good about your miserable life, but you didn't love her. Because you don't destroy people you love.-Grey's Anatomy-

Fave. Quote #13

"Emptiness is a gift"-PFS

Fave. Quote #12

"Why do people say grow some balls ? Balls are weak and sensetive. If you want to be tough grow a vagina. Those things can take a pounding."- Betty White

Fave. Quote #11

"The end is where we begin"-Passed down from TFK

Wolf Pack

Wolves are often killed by men.
Its stupid really
Wolves are better than they are.

In a Wolf pack,
Everyone takes care of you.
Aunt,uncle,parents,siblings.
In a Wolf Pack,
the wolves stick together.
No lies, no betrayal,
No abandonment.
In a Wolf pack,
you don't have to worry,
or be scared of being alone.
In a Wolf pack,
each wolf has respect,
a place, and a lick on the cheek.
In a Wolf pack,
its fun to play,
and proudly fights to protect.
In a Wolf pack,
death can not separate love,
mistakes are forgiven.
In a Wolf pack,
family treat each other better,
than how human beings treat every living thing.

I thought I was in a Wolf pack.
 But every person is the same.
It's human nature.
It's life.

Fave. Quote(Con.) # 10

"The past is what makes us who we are"-Unknown1
"Yes but it is up to us if we want to let go and move on"-Unknown2
"What makes you say that ?"-Unknown1
"You'll seen soon enough"-Unknown2

"Dreams are lives you never lived" -Unknown

The Time has come (Present and Past)

Time has come and went
Flew fast like a bee
Yet soft and gently like a butterfly
Can you hear me !
It's time to set you free
Free from this Captivity
The time has come
My dear seed
Already the rose of a lily path
Has to leave
The time has come
To believe
What heart tells you
It's time
To be free
Free from my love
This Captivity
That's held you son long
So hear me
I love you
I know you love me
But the time has come
Open your eyes
Don't be afraid
Trust me

             I let go of your hand. You fall from a cliff. Your falling softly. My tears follow as yours fly. I can still feel your heart, as if were to be in my right hand. Into the abyss you descend. I thought I heard you scream "NO !!!!!!!!!". You wake up. It was just a dream. My words are now nothing but faded memories. You're in a meadow. All in white. Birds flying, trees dancing, the wind singing. Flowers blooming per step you take. "I'm home" I heard you say. My lady, you shall be missed. Missed being in my side. Holding my hand. Like I held yours when we first met. You were dilerious. You cvouldn't see. You were crying. All alone in the dark."Help me.... please ?". Pitch black. I was only walking by when I heard your songs of sorrow. I walked to you. I said hello. And that's when you looked up and saw me. You replyed "Don't leave !". I told I won't. I was only ten step away, until the shadows came. Grabbing you, pulling you back, so I ran ! As fast as I can. They let you go. As if ewere meant to be. I held you in my arms, as you held me. You asked me to make a promise, "don't leave". Stupidly I agree. Actually more selfishly I kept you near me. Within the darkness I called my home. You didn't belong here. Not with me. Infinity passed and I've never been happier. Until...  You're light began to fade. And I knew that the time has come. You need to go home. And now that you're not here, it no longer feels like home. You're light. I'll protect. My heart will keep. My love, you don't know it but you're not alone. I just wish you can see me when I'm right in front of you. Oh how I long for your arms to be around me.

Alone

Leave me alone
There's no need for pity nor regrets
I promised was made
And it should be kept
I am here
It's okay
It's time
To let go
Leave me alone
Let me suffer on my own
We've already shared many things
With each other
I just care too much
To even let you borrow
Leave it alone
Let it be
With me
This light
This fire
It is the key
To destruction
And peace
It's harmed you before
Like a bad dream
So leave me alone
Let it die out
Like the inside of me
If you sole you can...
No!
Forget it !
Let it be !
The time has come,
Time to let go of me
Leave me here
You pure soul                                                                                -Love, Thy Beloved Anonymous


PS, this was inspired by the song Synthesia - The Other Promise (KH Piano Collections)

Love

A wish was granted

And regretted

Unable to love

Unable to cherish

Unable to feel

Only envy

A wish was granted

And regretted

No love

But no pain

Not numbness

No love

Not for me

Not for you

Not for anybody

A promise

Needeth to made

Not for the holy one

A one to keep

And for one that is wished to be loved

"I only wish to protect"

What is love anyways ?

I don't know

I don't care

A wish was granted

A wish was kept
And now I've wept
A promise made out of fear
It's pointless to now hold what's dear
If I can't even feel their presence with me
A promise is made
And it is a promise to keep

When a stranger makes you smile...

Fave. Quote #9

"Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth." -Oscar Wilde

She Loves Me A Lot

She loves me
 She loves me not
 I've sent her poetry
 And candy in a box
 She never noticed me
 Until I stopped
 She missed me!
 She "missed" me slot?
 We've strolled through streets
 Together we went out
         [Years Pass]
 She loves me
 She loves me not
 Tonight will be splendid
 Or so I thought
 I'm at her door
 Nervous I give a knock
Instead of my love
 Her father opens up
 He's hurting
 And tearing a lot!
        (What's going on??? )
 He invites me in
 "Thank you very much"
 I squeeze this ring-a trinket
 My gift to her
 I get a bad feeling
 My neck hair springs up
 Her something parents look at me
 My time was up
 "There was a shooting...
...in the middle...She was caught..."
 I drop-this stings!!!
 Time has stopped
            [Next day]
 "I'm in front of your coffin Here... tulips, baby's breath, forget me nots.
 I feel your arms around me
 And I hear you say... "I love you a lot""

She said she loved me
She said she cared
But that was before
She disappeared

Fave. Quote #8

"A laugh is worth a hundred groans in any market" Charles Lamb

Actions Speak Louder Than Words

    I've always been told that "actions speak louder than words". I deeply disagree. I've watched the people in this world do what they do. But before judging I question their intention. I think before I speak. Have we not all unintentionally hurt someone by doing what is  right ? If so then I thank you. If not, let me explain.

    As kid you intend to be really curious. And a famous curiosity is the curiosity of love. Boys and girls get their heart broken, hence, cheated on, used, rejected, mistreated. But like all organisms we grow. And as humans we often settle down over the years and create a new life. Let's say a baby girl. This beautiful creation-YOUR CREATION, a portion of yourself, is in your arms. Only three months old. So young, so beautiful. You close your eyes for a split second and your child is now 15 years old. Has a crush on another person of the same age group. You know what it is like to grow up and get hurt. And you've protected this creation of yours from all harm, knowing you can not do that forever. You tell your one of a kind child that she isn't ready, that she can't go out with that person. She thinks to herself Why ? Why me ? This isn't fair ! Why do they want me to be alone ? why can't I date ? Why are they suddenly hating me ? Random thoughts of questioning your command. But don't worry. It is only temporary. She is just hurt. Hurt because she does not understand your intentions. You think to yourself Its just for the best. She does it anyway and got used for sex. You hold her in your arms and think I tried to prevent this. Then you tell her "I love you ".

                                                       Another example would be:

    A single mother have recently just had a baby boy. She has no money. No food. No family. And not even a home. All she had was a heart. When the time came when she was to leave the hospital with her child she searched for the best orphanage in town. And so she gave her only precious treasure to the arms of another woman. And before the mother dared to say good bye she held her baby in her arms, whispered to his ear "I love you". Gave him a big kiss on the lips. And the women grabbed the baby and said to the mother "God bless you". Years passed and the boy like any other orphan thought that his mother didn't love him. On the boy's eleventh birthday the orphanage received a call for the boy. The caller requested to meet the boy today and insisted that the orphanage creates an appointment today. And so they did. The  boy was sent to sit in the waiting room for the mysterious caller. As soon as he heard high heel foot steps he turned to see what appeared to be a moderate wealthy woman. She ran to him and dropped to her knees, holding him oh so tight in her arms. She whispered again in his ear "I love you". He then knew that this strange woman was no other than his mother. And that his mother have came back for him. She regains his custody and takes him home. "I love you too". They went home. This time, she had food, money, a home, and most importantly has more love than ever.


    I have many other examples but I suppose these true stories probably bored you. 

Who's right and who's wrong ?

    This a short story is about a 13 year old boy, his cat,  and his father. The boys family had psychological problems. Luckily he has non whatsoever. But his father-schizophrenic and bipolar. They never saw eye to eye but that's another story. The cat belonged to a previous family member. And while the cat was growing up the boy would pet-sit the cat while it's owner was gone. Which was most of the time. The previous owner also refused on letting the children under the boys age near the cat. So the sole person the cat knew was the boy. And so they became the best of friends. The previous owner moved leaving the cat in the boy's ownership. The boy was enlightened.
     One night his father lost his temper for what seemed to a normal person petty-but for his father... it was blasphemy you can say. He went after the boys cat. Stabbing, choking, punching, and finally through him out the door. The boy got it next. But much less "discipline". To him, the torture that his dear cat for a friend went through was the worst than what the devil had plans for a rapist. The boy thought to himself it should have been me. The next day, the boy happened to find the cat hiding behind the trash can. The cat recognized the boy and flew to his arms. The boy took his cat to a friend. And sadly had to say goodbye. But he knew that his friend would help his cat find a home. And the boy was right. His friend personally handed the cat to the man he worked for. And that man was quite wealthy. The man even owned a house and a large piece of land.
     The cat was safe. The boy was happy. Yet unknowingly they cry for each other time to time. Meow ?

      This short story is about a 14 year old girl and her dog. And her family has financial problems. She brings home a cat from the street. Everyone (who already had no respect for her best friend) now ignores him completely and cares all about the "rookie". The little girl rarely had any money, so she couldn't provide for her dog on her own. No matter how many times she reminds her mother (for the past 4-5 months straight) she repeatedly claims that she will. The next day her mother comes with two bags of cat food and one bag of kitty-litter. Now each of the two bags way about 30 pounds. Her mother was able to spend 70 bucks in cash for a cat that was already being fed more than well. Now the little girls dog has been starving. The human food that the little girl has been sneaking to him wasn't enough. So the little girl did what was best for her dog knowing it would leave him a deep wound within his heart. But what she did knew was a distant family member who would be able to properly take care of the dog. Sadly the dog cried 2-3 nights straight for her. And though he seems to understand that he knows this is his knew home... he awaits for her return of which she promised.

A Vampire and a Hybrid.

A vampire born into the world of the human race. Single child, harsh mother. And plain father. And along with the family, they were all human. No guidence what so ever. And now he thinks he should just pretend to be human. And give up his dreams as being the top murderer of England, to be kinky in public, and so forth.

But most importantly he wishes to meet at least one more of his kind. He's tired of seeing the same creature in the mirror, tired of hearing the same voices over and over again. He somewhat phsycicly connected with a hybrid. Wanted to offer partnership. Partnership for life. And now he's given up. That hybrid supposses that she was not enough. Either way she still has not given up herself, and she will not allow him to deny himself. Creatures of the night still can choose a side. Some have chosen light and others dark. This hybrid is what her name means. Mix. And she intends to balance herself between the two natures and troubles herself with the day to come. As for the vampire, he is dark. But like in all worlds, in all beings, in all natures-there is a thing such as "Ying-and-Yang". One side can not exist whithout the other. And there is little of each within. This vampire has not yet seen the world though he is older than the hybrid. And rarity they don't see eye to eye. Sadly the part of which they disagree on is something the vampire should store into his knowlege and keep. The hybrid wishes to save the vampire from certain corruption. For she-the hybrid-has been the only being in the world who can understand and accept him for who he is. In her eyes, he is her "Yang". Will faith lead their way to eachother ? Or further apart ? Two countries, two worlds, two natures, two beings, soon to collide ? In my uttermost opinion I wish them the best. I believe they need all the support they can get. Especially the vampire.

Fave. Quote #7

"You can not not love others untill you learn to love yourself"

I'm breaking through this life
Nothing can hold me back no longer
I'm seeing the truth a lies
I won't be denied no more
I have finally opened my eyes
And here I see love at first sight
In a blink it dies

Fave. Quote #6

"You don't deserve a rose. The rose deserves you"

Fave. Quote #5

"These dreams like ashes float away" - Michael Barnes

Fave. Quote #4

"Ones pain is lessened by another one's anguish" -William Shakespear

Fav. Quote # 3

"Holding the hand that holds me down" -Benjamin Burnley

Fave Quote # 2

Blood is thicker than water. But sometimes water runs deeper."

Sigh

So alone....

So hollow...

Nothing but a fire burns inside..

My soul.. deprived....

I watch above all ye who has scared me

We dare to play god

We take one step

And everything crashes

So cold

So daring

This incubus that dwells inside

Feeding on what’s left behind

I watch above all ye who has scared me

I dare to pour out my wrath

I take one step

The empire falls

I hate !

Being who I am !!!!

I hate this beast I've grown to be !!!

It wants to be free !!

And so do I

So tell me... so tell me now...

Will I remain...

Alone

So cold !

Running and trying to hide !!!!

Will I have to decide ?

Tell me then tell me now

Has the pure light within me died ?.....

I watch above all thee who’s helped me

I dare turn my back towards all

I take one step

And I fall

Into ashes I blow away

Numbness replaces the pain

Tears fly

Blood pours

Will I ever get a chance before...

My grey wings com-busts into flames

As I descend

It all fades away

Such melancholy

Everything is falling apart

Cities are crashing

Its all waning

Along with it I'm falling

For no longer am I standing

All thee who's looked down on me

Now watch me

I've hurt you

Cause you've hurt me

I've broken you

Cause you broke me

I said I love you

Cause you said you loved me

I let you fall because you let go of my hand

Now I'm falling

Will I ever get a chance before...

It awakens ?

I was born a human

I was born a transgression

I was born to soar

So I'll die falling

No regrets

No shame

From the depths I strive

I just want to survive

I watch above all ye who surrounds me

I dare to question all

When you take that step

Don't slip
And don't FALL